Love Is an Action Word, but Can You Be Loved?
Updated: Sep 5
As I mentioned in another post “…love isn’t cheating or being physically, verbally, or emotionally abusive. Now is it perfect?! Hell no…”, I feel like I’ve been inspired to discuss another perspective. As I listen to others and try to understand the different dynamics of why people choose to stay connected when it comes to unsatisfactory intimate relationships, I’m starting to wonder why it’s okay to even deal with for an extended period of time in the first place - I certainly did in the past! But NEWSFLASH! It’s not okay to deal with it. However, with that being said, I also feel like accountability, spiritual growth, maturity, open communication, and transparency plays a huge role in the up’s and down’s of a relationship because I’m no perfect patty either.
Questions to think about:
What does being loved look or feel like to you through actions?
What are your boundaries when it comes to a relationship, or when is enough, enough?
If your partner pisses you off or does something that irritates you, how would you communicate your frustration?
To align with someone spiritually, mentally(financial goals/freedom included), physically, sexually, and emotionally is interesting to think about and seems to be quite rare, but it also scares the fuck out of me to think about, too! Past emotional trauma (especially betrayal) takes time to heal from sometimes, but thankfully I’m chillin’ like a cucumba. I can’t speak for others, but money isn’t everything, and to have someone you align with or can be stimulated/inspired by while also providing reciprocated love, without physical touch consistently (actually! who knows…chile, libido and sexual tension/chemistry is interesting with the right person, but I digress) seems like a far-fetched dream. As I continue to remain abstinent, it isn't difficult because it’s worth the wait, and I’ve now come to the stage in my self-love journey where sex is energy, and I’m not giving up my energy to anyone else without reciprocity or a true commitment through actions. It’s almost funny to think about because as I continue to heal, if I were to meet “the one” tomorrow and they want to get married, this lil’ abstinent journey is going right out the window(clearly being facetious…but not really). [the previous statement is sarcasm sigh]
Anywho, as a woman, a.k.a. Divine feminine, although my main focus is elsewhere, too many times I’m seeing or hearing about relationships that make me want to literally throw up because of how toxic they are, but to each their own. I feel like in a Divine union, there should be a partnership, and for me personally, I want to sit in my femininity. Although they’re quite rare or seem to be extinct, a man who understands how to be vulnerable/emotional (a.k.a. cry) while understanding that being nurturing doesn’t emasculate him as a Divine masculine…while also being a provider, protective, and strong…seems to be far, few and in-between. In Chinese philosophy, yin-yang, yang(masculine) is the light and yin(feminine) is dark, and although difficult, trying to keep both energies balanced is key. In other words, there’s light and darkness in everyone or everything because one can’t exist without the other, but I digress. Back to love…
Once again(as mentioned in another post), I could never bring myself to sell my body in exchange for monetary gain or engage in a ménage à trois, but to each their own. I'm a serial monogamist and a true lover girl who's made several mistakes when it came to my self-love journey: The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly of Celibacy.
For me personally, unfortunately, a few frogs had to come before the real Prince, but now that I’ve learned to listen to my woman’s intuition and discernment, with patience and understanding, if a Divine (NOT KARMIC) union is meant to be, it’s inevitable. LOVE YOURSELF FIRST!
More Intimate Thoughts and Perspectives: https://www.dominiquesrobertsw.com/blog
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